33. Forgiveness with Nicole Harvick - The Quantum Energy Healer

What if true healing after infidelity starts with forgiving yourself? In this episode, I speak with Nicole Harvick, a quantum energy healer and forgiveness expert, who brings a completely fresh perspective to emotional healing. If you've been betrayed and feel stuck in pain, resentment, or confusion, this conversation is for you.

Nicole shares her personal story of heartbreak, how her journey into energy healing began after her own divorce, and why self-forgiveness is often the missing piece in infidelity recovery. Together, we unpack how energy, childhood wounds, and subconscious beliefs impact our present emotions, and how releasing them can bring powerful emotional freedom.

Key Takeaways:

• Forgiveness is for you, not them. Letting go doesn’t condone their actions, but frees you from emotional imprisonment.

• Your body holds emotional trauma. Releasing stuck energy, even from early childhood, can shift your physical and emotional well-being.

• Self-forgiveness is essential. Blaming yourself for the affair only deepens your pain. Healing starts with self-compassion.

• Spiritual healing isn't woo-woo. Whether you're logical or intuitive, emotional freedom comes from finding what resonates with you.

• Energy follows awareness. Recognising dense emotions like anger and shame allows you to consciously replace them with peace and love.

💬 Reflection questions:

Have you struggled with the idea of forgiveness after betrayal? Do you still carry blame or resentment, either toward your partner or yourself?

Connect with Luke:

• Website: www.lifecoachluke.com

• Instagram: @mylifecoachluke

• Email: luke@lifecoachluke.com

Join the After the Affair community at www.facebook.com/groups/aftertheaffaircommunity

Episode Transcript:

The After The Affair podcast with me Luke Shillings is here to help you process, decide and move forward on purpose following infidelity. Together we'll explore what's required to rebuild trust not only in yourself but also with others. Whether you stay or leave I can help and no matter what your story there will be something here for you.

Let's go. Hello and welcome to episode number 33 of the After The Affair podcast with myself Luke Shillings. Today I have the pleasure of speaking with Nicole Harvick who is known as the quantum energy healer and forgiveness expert.

She believes that all healing must start with self-forgiveness. Some of the modalities that she uses in her healing practise include Reiki, sound therapy, cellular memory healing and mild hypnosis. This is quite far removed from much of the things that I've spoken about on this podcast and I always think it's wonderful to embrace all of the different possible healing methods that are available to us and there's there is no one right way to heal.

Nicole is a notable speaker on topics of forgiveness and self-love and self-healing and her goal really is to touch as many lives as possible by helping people to find what they desire, require and deserve which then allows them to walk their earthly journey with emotional freedom, love and grace. So without further ado let's get straight into the conversation. Okay Nicole well thank you ever so much for joining us today.

It's wonderful to have you on the show. It would be great if you could start just by letting us know who you are, where you're from, what you're about, all the things. Well first of all I want to thank you for having me on your podcast.

It's really an honour. Just talking to you the last time I was very excited when you invited me on so many thanks for that. My name is Nicole Harvick and I live in the United States and I live in the state of South Carolina which is very different from me.

I'm from Arizona so I've only been living here about a year and I'm still getting used to it and I'm known as a quantum energy healer and a forgiveness expert Luke. Amazing. So quantum energy healer.

That's something that certainly prior to me meeting you was something I'd never heard of and didn't really know anything about and to be fair still relatively limited so maybe talk a little bit more to that. I would love to. I'm really enjoying my work not just as a healer but using the quantum in my healing because my description of quantum is past, present and future which if you know anything about that it's we're going on in many different dimensions all at once.

I know that's a really different concept for many people. I truly believe it. I've experienced some different dimensions myself so I know that to be true for at least me and when I work with my healing in quantum what I'm doing is I'm finding out the source of your pain or your stuck energy or what's blocking you from your emotional freedom and oftentimes we have to go back to childhood and there's either a statement, there's been distress, there's been emotional issues, there unfortunately have been some sexual issues of kids getting abused and so what I'm really looking for in the quantum field is when this happened, why this happened and then we can move forward with releasing that memory which is stuck in your subconscious.

What led you this way? How did you find yourself on this particular path? That's a great question because my catalyst is a divorce which it often is and what happened was I was so broken after that divorce that I was looking for modalities to learn so I could actually heal myself and I remember going and this is probably at least 10 years ago, I remember going to like a psychic fair just to check it out just to see what it was and I've always been someone who has really astute intuition, you know I listen to my gut, I listen to my heart so I always knew I was a little bit of an intuitive but I walked up to the very first booth and the lady looked at me she says you're a healer aren't you and I said well I don't know I said I put band-aids on my kids when you know they scraped their knee but you know I never really thought of that and that was always kind of in the back of my mind but as I started learning healing modalities for myself I'm a Reiki master I have certificates in in quantum energy healing and that's when we have literally have memories in our cellular memory so I just started exploring all this and it really became fascinating to me not just for myself but but looking at it with others and so the quantum came in after I started experiencing it and realised that so many things actually start in early childhood generally before the age of 7 and I will tell you that so far the youngest that I have found that really had some severe issues I went back I took her back to 18 months old and yeah it was pretty crazy she had no idea and what had happened was she was with her mother and her mother was bringing in a bag of groceries and she wanted to help her carry it and the mom says no this is too heavy for you so the mom gave her just a little can of soup and so she was carrying that but she tripped and she dropped it and her mother called her dumb and worthless and can't do anything at 18 months and you and I both have kids so you can imagine you can imagine how that felt so she went through her whole life she's 55 now she went through her whole life thinking she was worth worthless making the wrong choices picking the wrong men and really never knowing why until we found that and we released it and it was quite an ordeal but that's how I really got interested in in healing is because when I went through everything myself I thought you know what if I can do this anyone can heal at any time space or age to their benefit amazing it's interesting one of the reasons that I when we met I wanted to bring you on to the show is because there are I did an episode a while back I forget exactly what it was called but it was it was focused on the right way to heal but it was a play on words in the sense that actually there is no right way to heal regardless of what experience the people have been through there are many different things that people resonate with my approach is perhaps a bit more logical cognitive less spiritual let's say but the realities that different people resonate and and connect with all of these different modalities let's say these different versions and ways which is why I was so intrigued into hearing this different perspective so yes it's amazing that we can even go back that far I mean I can barely remember before I was 10 you know and my often joke with my with my mom when we're talking and my memory seems to be atrocious it'd be interesting to delve deep to see what there is if there was anything hidden and suppressed there but very interesting all the same and it can be very scary because you don't know what's buried in there and some of the people I have worked with are very fearful of going back because they know something really bad's there and they want to they want to find out what and why and how to heal it but oftentimes they're still very very suppressed so when I take someone back you have to let them know you made it we're here you're safe you made it so I take them back in a way that they can see it but they're not going to feel it like they did when they were going through it and so that seems to be very very effective for the most part there are a few that absolutely can't do it at this moment and that's fine that's fine we work with what we have and then there may be there could come a time in the future that we move forward with actually finding that exact moment in time and releasing it I see so what point in people's journeys do do they tend to seek out your kind of kind of work are they already very specifically they've had some problems throughout their life or they're recognising something or or is it more like me for example who I my life's been relatively okay of course it's had its ups and downs like anybody's there's no obvious sort of you know thing that I feel like I'm holding from childhood let's say doesn't mean that there isn't anything there of course and I'm open to all kinds of things but just just interesting in terms of how people even get to you in terms of what point in their journey they do that that's something that I've found really really interesting because what I'm seeing more and more of is I've been doing this not necessarily the healing but I've been in a spiritual I've been experiencing a spiritual life for a very very long time what some people would call you know woo-woo I was a woo-woo person you can call it whatever you want but I was very I was very aware that there was something more I was always aware I didn't I maybe didn't know exactly what it was or how to get there but I read a lot I read a lot of books and it I just started thinking there's got to be more than just getting up going to work coming home going to bed and having two days off a week that just didn't seem to satisfy me and I couldn't figure out how it was satisfied anyone else so I started looking into all these modalities and then I started no way noticing conditioning of people and it seems like right now and I know this to be true we're in a in a time of the Great Awakening and this is this is truly something that's happening worldwide for a lot of people not everybody but for a lot of us and so they're starting to question their why and it and it might be just like this little tiny morsel in their mind of there's got to be something more well yeah that kind of makes sense that that really doesn't make sense so they start questioning things and I have a lot of conversations on Clubhouse and I started noticing more and more people coming into the rooms and really wondering what is this why are you doing it how does it work what am I looking for there were so many questions and so I think overall you know some are going to be very complacent and you know want to do the Monday through Friday sit in front of the TV on the weekend and go back to work and enjoy a beer or or whatever you want to do but there's a lot of people I'm noticing at this point in my life that are really starting to look around and notice that something's just a little bit off not not just with them but everywhere and then you start digging you start questioning yourself and you're like you know why am I acting this way why does that hurt why does that make me cry you're starting to you're starting to raise your consciousness and when you do that you're also raising your awareness and then you start realising that what's going on inside of you which is where your truth lies doesn't seem to be cohesive with the rest of what's going on around you sure and so it's kind of baby steps for a lot of people I've had some people that literally they wake up they tell me I don't know what's going on I'm seeing energy I'm having these experiences what do I do what is it well some some get some get it fast others take baby steps so there's a different there's a everybody's different and everybody's okay it doesn't matter how you get there but when you really start looking at yourself in terms of energy frequency and vibration which is from Nikola Tesla back in the early 1900s that's what we are we're energetic beings at a vibration so people are starting to become aware of that and starting to understand that their subconscious is holding a lot of things in there that they're really not aware of and they're they're really seeking out the why of who they are why do I make these decisions why does this hurt my feelings why do I remember this and it's it's really interesting it's like just all of a sudden there's an awareness that that the things I've been holding in I can get rid of amazing so there's actually a couple of things that are coming up for me that as you were talking one was that at the beginning you'd said you'd used the the term woo-woo in past tense as then you used to be woo-woo and yet it is interesting that I'm thinking my bit myself and maybe for some of the people listening that something like a quantum energy healer that sounds woo-woo and I don't please I don't mean that in any kind of offensive way it's just it's interesting that you swap the terminology in terms of past to maybe an alternative view of what you think it is now and so I'd like to hear a little bit more to that and then secondly I might ask this question separately anyway but secondly it was in terms of you that the change that you've seen in people over the recent period of time I was wondering if that tied in specifically with things like COVID things with like the increased polarisation with with politics not that I want to go down that route specifically but just in terms of this this differing in the world there seems to be more divide than there probably ever has been or certainly over the last five to ten years or so and just whether that in itself is playing a or what part you think that might be playing in people seeking this this great awareness let's say when I talk about when I talk about woo-woo in the past tense that was what we were all referred to and so I found my people you know I've meditated there's things such as astral travel that that can happen it's it's I'm gonna say for me it was exciting to finally find my people and to understand that who I am and the gifts that I've been given are for the greater humanity for the greater good for that allows me to help people so after finding and I you know I say this like more people like me we all have the abilities but we're either afraid of them we don't want to be made fun of or told not my daughter's mom I have friends coming over don't talk about this I'm like okay okay so I mind I'm a good mom but there was a time when only a select few would talk about it and then Louise Hay came around and she is Hay house she started publishing books about all this about word ology about about astral travel about you know psychics so it became a little I'm gonna say a little more common not a lot because there's some people that will never accept it no matter what and that's okay but then I once I realised there there were people like me out there I guess I should say it was like well you know I consider what I've been given a gift because oftentimes well every time when I work on a body I can tap into it I can get ages I can get the feeling I can get the visualisation of that time when that actually happened and I can usually see it so to me when I can assist in a way like that and help take someone back and I can I can say you know were you seven were you and yeah it might be a suggestion but it really enhances the experience because I'm there with them kind of holding their hand there's something that might be a bit scary and so when I realised that that I was playing small I realised that if I do have these gifts and I'm not sharing them with people that are interested not everybody's going to be interested I understand that and the time for me is no longer trying to convince people that I can help you if you want to try that's fine if you don't that's fine also but I decided not to play small I no longer call it woo-woo because I know it to be true because I'm I'm working with people I'm seeing the results yeah and you know it's really it's really phenomenal what I'm seeing and you know like I said energy frequency and vibration that's what we are it is so fascinating it is and you know I think about the own journey that I've been on and like I said earlier I've I've followed probably something that feels natural to me which is logic and process and understanding so when I use you know a variety of tools in my coaching and both on myself and I genuinely believe that in 99.9% of cases it's our thinking and our beliefs that are creating feelings our emotions which we are experiencing in the body of course that is a form of energy and I recognise that these things can sort of pass from one thing to another in some sense in terms of whether I'm seeing quite the same way that you're describing is I'm not fully there but it's really interesting I'm really intrigued by it but you know I planted a seed with you yes absolutely absolutely and I'm sure that you have planted the seed with some of the people listening as well I have no doubt yeah and that's sometimes that's all we can do you know and then when they come to us we're there exactly and it is as it is the same here as well not everybody is gonna resonate with my message and nor do I expect them to you know I offer what I have and I hope that it helps people and people are always welcome to reach out and ask questions or work with me or any of the things and there is no expectation for them to do that I would rather that people found the thing that connected with them most to help them through whatever it is that they're currently experiencing whether that be a short term more acute problem or something that's been through sort of a developmental stage of their life or just something that's all been transitional through the entire period of their life and yeah very very fascinating so one of the other reasons I brought you on is because obviously in addition to the quantum energy healing there's this element of forgiveness as well and of course this is something that I speak about of course with the people I'm talking to and working with who mostly experienced betrayal and infidelity and there are some exceptions of course but forgiveness can be obviously a very difficult and very complex process for many people so how do you typically approach helping someone work through forgiveness and what are some of the common roadblocks that you've seen and that you faced along the way the most common roadblock is the inability to understand that forgiveness is for you they hold such a grudge against the person who they perceived to do them wrong which you know I did the same thing I did the same thing Luke I thought what and it was my ex-husband you know there was cheating there was lies and I was I was crushed I won't lie about that and what was happening to me and and having experienced that's why I really feel I'm I'm far better off helping people because I've been there I speak from experience and what was happening is like I talked about I'm going through all these healing modalities trying to heal myself and I'm getting sicker and sicker and I'm losing weight my hair's falling out and I'm scratching my skin until it bleeds and I'm like my gosh you know what is going on here what I'm I'm a healer but I can't heal myself what is going on and it was really interesting I went to the island of Hawaii during that period and I I have guides that I talked to and they talked to me and when I was I was taking a hike on the bulk of the volcano and I had brought food with me because it was a half a day hike and I was crossing this little wooden slats bridge over a big ravine and I heard my guides say make an offering to the island and you know the islands are alive you know they come up out of the ocean they're volcanic there I mean Hawaii's probably the most incredible place I've ever been to so I threw half a sandwich in there I'm like well I'm gonna be hungry I can't give it my whole my whole sandwich and then I and they had told me before I left feed the stray and I'm like okay the stray I was looking for a dog so I made an offering to the island I took about maybe I don't know maybe it was a half a mile and I heard this rustling in the foliage and I'm like what is that so my daughter's with me I've been down to look and it's this little tiny bird with with these bright red eyes I'd never seen anything like it but it's little foot was hobbled and it was starving and so my daughter bent down to give it some food out of her hand and it ate right out of her hand and I just heard that's your stray so I don't question anything when my guides tell me to do something but but when I came home from the islands I started I started seeing this word everywhere and it's ho'oponopono and it's it's I love you I'm sorry please forgive me and thank you very simple very simple and I started using that mantra every day and I would just I would meditate and I just say it over and over and over I would visualise my ex-husband coming on a stage and I just kept saying it and eventually I started forgiving him it's like all my anger melted away all the animosity all the pain the hurt and I thought oh my gosh this is crazy what is going on here and then I started healing so what I was missing in my healing process was forgiveness and it wasn't for him because he did what he did and he never really apologised it was like well you didn't give me any attention so I had to seek it out elsewhere he didn't care he was never gonna apologise so I didn't do it for him I did it for me and this is something I can absolutely relate to without doubt my own story as well not dissimilar in terms of you know the holding this this story of what forgiveness meant you know those many people do go through life thinking that forgiving someone is letting them off the hook it's condoning their actions in some way and of course the reality is this it's the absolute opposite of that like you said you didn't even your husband didn't have to change and you don't even need to tell him it's actually got nothing to do with him I didn't I never even I never even said that but you know it's so interesting because I tell people it's like if they didn't care enough about you to not hurt you that way why are you carrying that pain that they caused they're not thinking about it they're not gonna apologise why are you continuing to carry the hurt they caused you you know whoever it was they're off the hook already they don't care but you're in pain and you're suffering and usually when I try to explain it that way it makes sense but I do tell everybody that for me forgiveness is really spiritual in nature just due to the fact that sometimes your brain can't wrap can't wrap around the fact that it's it's for you not them and it's to me it's more more of something that it's spiritual you're releasing for you it's it's the it's one of the only times you can really be selfish and it's okay because it's for you not them and when I explain it like that they're they're a little more apt to want to move forward but a lot of times it's a very slow process with forgiveness it is it is it's something that there's a lot of resistance and actually natural fact as you're talking I'm thinking it's like well where does that come from why why is there this this belief that forgiveness is in fact all about letting the other person off the hook about they would some in some way benefit from you forgiving them right but but they don't it makes no difference and you know what I've found what I think it is is when you want to continue the blame or the hate or the shame with that person that is ego that's your ego trying to protect you and it does a really good job at times but for me true forgiveness you can't be an ego it's not possible so when you really understand forgiveness and you decide you don't want to hurt anymore you don't want to carry that pain you're releasing everything you're releasing ego as well exactly and I think you're right I think ego it makes it makes it very clear it turns into an almost point scoring activity where there has to be a winner particularly if you're the one that's been betrayed you're the one that's been hurt and you feel like there's something that you must take back to balance the scales it's it's a very earthly feeling you know it's very three-dimensional it's like okay if you do that then I'm gonna do this you're not gonna win because I'm gonna hold this against you and it's not doing you any good you feel terrible you hurt you cry your stomach hurts your body's at dis-ease you create things in your body from the anger from the stress from you know the emotional turmoil that that pain has caused you and all you're doing is making yourself sick so once you really understand the beauty of forgiveness being for you you can forgive you can take the ego out of it and you are a hundred percent the winner and that person never has to know it and that kind of leads on to my next question anyway which is what are the benefits of forgiveness I know we've sort of touched this little bit already but not just for the person because we're talking about forgiveness being something that we do as the person who needs to forgive the person who has hurt us in some way betrayed us but when we do offer forgiveness what benefits are there really for this the individual but also what are the benefits for the person who has done the betraying particularly in the example of infidelity because many people do remain in relationships after infidelity has occurred so when it comes to forgiveness although technically the unfaithful spouse doesn't have to find out or know or experience it in some way they will still be affected by the forgiveness that the betrayed partner has I just wonder if you could sort of talk to that at all absolutely what I think transpires what transpired for me was a path of emotional freedom I felt so free because when you carry around hate and anger animosity anything like that those are dense heavy energies that you're literally storing in your cells and in your body when you have the ability to release those and there's many ways there's tears there's there's showering can release things water just mantras you can say just like ho'oponopono you're releasing some really heavy energies that are that are you don't even realise what they're doing inside of you but they are making you sick just like I bled my hair fell out when you release those you have the ability to replace them with things you want such as joy love for yourself that's very very important people that usually hang on to non-forgiveness don't love themselves they don't they don't understand that concept but once you start replacing those dense heavy negative energies with very light positive energies you absolutely feel different inside you you can start waking up and joy you waking up in gratitude you want to start your day you feel good it and and when you start doing that for me I thought man I feel really great and I started thinking about this I thought you know I love my kids love my parents love my dog I'd never thought about loving myself that was something that never occurred to me and I thought you know I haven't done everything right and there's a lot of things I still have to forgive about myself but it dawned on me it's like you know you did those things and they didn't always turn out for the best but you didn't with pure intent there was never any malice involved and so that actually helped me forgiving other people because I thought you know maybe they didn't know what they did not in my ex's case he knew perfectly well but but you know a lot of people do things and if you do what you think is right at the time with the information you have that's all you can do and I thought about and I thought well you know if I'd have done this different with my daughter this would have happened and it's like I truly did what I thought was best at the time so it not only helped me understand other people that have done things like that but it helped bring me to a place of self-love and self-respect which I'd never really had before so it really was a win-win for me all the way around. You spoke to it a little bit there in terms of the benefits that it has to yourself not only in terms of the forgiveness in terms of the relieving of the burden if you like the the weight that we carry with us when we hold somebody else responsible for some misfortune or some negative experience that we've had or betrayal in this case but when we look more specifically to forgiving yourself because one of the things I noticed both with myself and with with my clients is that everything all the focus is on the person who has done wrong but often when a situation like that has occurred particularly in a relationship environment I'm not saying there aren't examples where it isn't applicable but it's particularly in a relationship environment there have been things that have ultimately led to a scenario that has where the relationship has maybe not been as healthy as it could have been maybe people have they've lost connection they're not really focussing on driving the relationship in a specific direction and of course this never justifies the behaviour of one person over the other but sometimes this can create circumstances situations that make it easier let's say or or maybe people just start feeling like they're not getting fulfilled from their relationship so they start looking elsewhere or maybe opportunity arises there's a combination of factors there is no one specific thing but I find it very interesting that all of the focus is on forgiving the other person when we have any criticism of other people it's very common for the criticism that we have of that person to be in some way mirrored and reflected back on ourselves in terms of our own judgments in terms of the way that we're looking at the world maybe something that we're suppressing because of things that you know values that we're not prepared to face ourselves so it's very easy to criticise others and then not necessarily stand by those same rules ourselves and I don't mean that means we go out and cheat and be unfaithful but just our core values to that so forgiving yourself can be just as difficult as forgiving others so how do you help people work towards self-forgiveness and what are some of the strategies for overcoming those feelings of guilt and shame and self-blame and you know that's a great question because when I first found out that my ex was cheating on me I was so embarrassed I it was like this has to be a family secret don't tell anybody but I blamed myself what could I have done better what what should I have done I didn't do this I should have done that a tonne of self-blame and as I started my healing journey I started thinking about it and it was like but he's an adult too he made a choice and he chose to do that and you know he had been doing it for many many years and and we went on vacations we had this beautiful family from the outside looking in everything was perfect but what I realised was is that whatever is going on inside of him is not to blame me I can't blame myself for his feelings he's the one that has to find those he has to figure him out just as if something's going on with me and I'm projecting it on to someone else I need to look inside and answer those questions and I think that was what has helped me and others is is the huge understanding that what's going on inside of the other person is not a reflection of you it's a reflection of them I could have done nothing different we were married 25 years you know you have ups and downs and you know a fight here but then you have these beautiful children and you go on vacations and everything looks beautiful from the outside but the thing is he was never happy no matter what we had so what's going on inside of him that's keeping him unhappy and he still hasn't figured it out but when I forgave him and I finally forgave myself and it brought me to a place of self-love I had filled myself so full of positivity and I mean that's not to say we don't have a rainy day or things don't go wrong of course but I look at him now and I have compassion I don't have sympathy because he knows what he did he you know he knows it was wrong but the compassion for a soul that is is so he's so lost I guess I would say and so now we've been divorced since 2019 and I have to tell you that I still send him love and I still still send him blessings but it's on a soul level it's on a very different level because everyone deserves love it's just it's what we come here to learn it's the the strongest emotion you can feel and the reason I do that is because there's two reasons because he can't love himself and I know that and because everything you send out comes back to you so why wouldn't I want love compassion and forgiveness to come back to me if I'm sending it out to him people think I'm crazy and it's like no you don't understand we come here to learn love you know it's just it's such a phenomenal feeling and and it's really interesting because I can look at people now and I love them I love them on a soul level we you know regardless of their their human flaws it's like you know everybody deserves it everybody it is this unconditional love this unconditional love that and I think just being being clear that that love comes from within it's not about how much you can receive from others because in theory you people can say words people do things people do all of these things but only you experience right feeling of love and love is amazing what why would you why would you choose another feeling to fit to feel about another human being yeah and if the more you send out the more you get back think of your heart expansion you see you truly and I'm gonna I'm honestly you feel different but you look different I have a picture of me from 2014 when I was going through all this I I don't even know who that girl was I look at it my eyes were blank and it's like my gosh and then I look at myself now not just how I look but but how I feel and my personality and and I'm eager I'm excited to start the day and it's it's just it's such a better choice forgiveness is always the better choice exactly fantastic one more question that I had just while you were talking earlier on it was when you were talking about working with your clients can you only work with people one-to-one in person or do you work people over zoom like this or what does it look like for you since COVID I've pretty much done everything by zoom I have worked on many people in person because I do the Reiki but I can feel where energy is stuck and energy is dense you can literally pull it out of someone's body so I can do that but I can also grab on to it because there's no space and time really you know we've got these perceptions of well we're just by zoom but what you have to understand is we're all of one consciousness so I can tap in and pull some of that out so I do zoom I have to done rooms where there's bigger healings it's not as specific to that person but it's more like a it's like a heart chakra type meditation of of I lead them to where their pain is I go inside of them and see where they find it and then we do we just put their hand over their heart and I'll lead them through some statements you know here's here's what you're going to feel your heart's going to expand you're going to feel release it's going to come out of you so so statements like that and so we can do group healing and then sometimes when they when they feel the effects of that group healing they understand what it feels like and they really do want to go deeper to really pinpoint those places of hurt or that that feeling of anger or or why do I behave this way and one quick example as I was working with the gentleman and he told me he says you know he says I always go from either really happy to really angry said okay let's go find that so I you know I kind of do a little hypnosis very light I said what colour do you see and he says you know he goes I see purple I said okay I said what is that what is significant about purple he says well he says I'm in church and I see it on the preachers you know the how they wear those little I don't know even what they're called yeah but he saw that I said so you're in church right now right he says yeah I'm about seven years old and we're in church he says I said what's the feeling you feel he says it's really peaceful I'm with my family my my two siblings in my mom and dad said okay I said after you leave church what happens he says well I go home he says and my mom cooks the same dinner every Sunday she says he says we eat dinner he says in every Sunday after church my parents get into a fight and my dad leaves every Sunday he says and then my mom sits there and cries I said okay I said I want you to think about this you go from a very peaceful existence in your church you're happy everything's fluid you get in the car you go home and there's no in-between you're peaceful and then there's chaos because your mom and dad fight and your dad leaves so boom that there's why he has that personality trait because of something that happened when he was six or seven years old these things do stick they stick they're powerful mm-hmm that's why I I 12 I tell people be very cautious with your words you know to little ones be very cautious what you're saying because words will stick in there and and even the tone of voice you know sometimes we you know we're as a parent we're scared that our kids are gonna get hurt so we gasp or something but you know you have to realise that up till age seven that we call them those little sponges good or bad super absorbent yes absolutely absolutely well I want to say thank you for joining me today and I have no doubt that my listeners will have gained a wealth of insight and knowledge from your time here and it's been fantastic to have you on board so how can people find you and and reach out to you it's very easy I kept it very simple for myself everything's under Nicole Harvick but I am on Facebook I'm on Instagram I'm on LinkedIn and my website is Nicole Harvick calm and you can find a link there my Calendly is on there and I do a complimentary 30-minute get-to-know-me session so if anybody would like to reach out for that I would love that I you know it's so so amazing now that we can talk to someone in a different country so I'm I you know I've got people in Africa I've got people in Canada and so please reach out to me a lot of people are I'm gonna call it waking up right now have a lot of questions and I'd be happy to answer those questions as best I can for you excellent and I'll put all those details in the show notes as well well thank you again Nicole have a great year yeah I will I will thank you so much.